This's nothing....

10/3 (Thursday)

I'm very unhappy right now. I'm not sure what made my mood into this, probably what J said. 'Cause he saw A's hands on my shoulder, so he said: Owhh, finally I know why you hate guys!!! *I can assure you, he's so wrong about it == Then before 11.30pm, I stood there seeing C went home early again. Hell, why always so unfair???

What J said should cause nothing to me, and that C going home early, I usually could bare it 'cause she's about to leave. But this time I can't, I just felt awfully terrible. A lot of unhappy memories flashed back my minds, how can I be smiling?? Well J said I hate guys, he really don't understand me at all. So just be it 'cause he don't have to. And hello, I just hate some of them, with suck mouth + attitude. Especially those who think they're so cool or handsome but eventually they're just looked normal. Yucksss, I think it's irritating!!!

The C going back home at an early time issue, made me thought of something not fair that happened to me in school. When I was a trainee prefect in afternoon session, I don't know why my leader and group leader treated me like they don't care?! *Even my performance isn't nice, you're so wrong in doing that!! 'Cause when I become a senior myself, I'm so damn sure I won't be that concentrated in my duties anymore. Thanks to your guys. Hmmpph, and things like that happened again in morning session: I still remember my 1st TL so partial about some of his members, that he treated me like he don't care.

Actually I'm a bit regret that I din't quit prefect in my morning session, but for the Coco marks I stayed. Days in there made me aware how dark the society is even before I stop schooling. Well, blame who?! Whatever, I would dislike those suckers always. Days in girl guide was not easy though, I don't wanna mention it. Maybe that time they're still naive but what they did that hurt me, I would definitely remember. Not that I wanted to, just those issues let me can't treat them like nice friend anymore :(

Those ugly past, I should just ignore it always. But now it made me so helpless, 'cause those lessons I learnt there are not enough. The world outside is even worser than I thought. Fine, the only reason I can tell myself is: I don't look that favourable in their view. Haizz, and that means I don't have the so-called "good" look to survive at all. Is that so important??? :(

P/S: What's left to me after fourteen more days??? I can't imagine :S

WS :'(